Dear Mr. Fix-it

Can you fix my brokens?

I've been malfunctioning for some time now and have had a few tests ran.

Each service call has gotten me nowhere and house calls just cost to much money, with little or no results.

I was hoping you can do diagnosis over the net, so that I might try some Do-it-yourself.

My first problem is I.ve had a brain fart  some time ago and I just don't know what to do with the air bubbles it has left. They often cause me to do some real air-headed things.

Then there is the leak in my eye that I sometimes just can not get to stop.

And God knows the leash on my tongue and the latch on my lips just both seems to malfunction at the same time everytime, especially when that little light flickers inside my head (and it just wouldn't stay on long enough for me to see before I say).

Not to mention the tick of my tongue and the clearing of my throat whenever I disagree.

Oh and the pain in my heart for fear of likes and dislikes of other people that I know I should just ignore but i can't.

Plus there is the click in my bones whenever I stand.

I know that these things can't possible all be related but for some reason they always seen to act or react with out my approval. Like Attitude has just taken over.

The end... Sincerely my body.

p.s/ Oh and sometime my feet stomps, my eyes and neck rolls, and my hands fly on my hips whenever someone confronts me.

p.p.s/ Please help, I realize you are not a doctor but I have tried everyone else, I'll be awaiting your reply.